The first intimate act with a new partner always ends with some kind of surprise. It is great, if it is a butterfly in the stomach and an amazing technique. But there are surprises that nobody needs, and it is better to talk about this in advance.
Sex should be safe and at least comfortable, so we need to discuss some vital issues before it. Some topics have nothing to do with romance, from other conversations in general everything will fall down, but there are no options – you need to clarify some points before you take off your panties.
Do you have a condom?
Today a big percent of people are infected with HIV. We have millions of patients with hepatitis B and C. For the first time with a new partner do not use hormonal tablets, an interrupted act, candles and lemon slices. But still all this may be used, but only in addition to condoms.
Even if the new partner shows you the certificate he received yesterday, this is not an option. In the same HIV infection, the incubation period lasts several months, that is, he could be infected a couple of weeks ago and the tests have not yet detected the virus.
You may trust such certificates only from regular blood donors who have to constantly check for HIV, and for hepatitis, and for syphilis. But a constant donor, in theory, himself must insist on a condom with a new partner.
By the way, there is also an allergy to latex, so allergy sufferers in such a case should be without latex protection.
Who first goes to the shower?
When the desire captures, there is no time to think about shower. But, honestly on the heart, it is the first sex with a new partner that sometimes opens up completely different from what we would like to learn about a person. There is a difference between an honest labor afterwards after a dance party and shorts of freshness a week.
Maybe it’s better to shower?
Is it just sex or something more?
Someone believes that after sex is not necessarily to get acquainted, but for someone, sex automatically means plans for three children and a silver wedding. Between these options, a hundred more gradations.
Let’s say one partner perceives sex as a test: whether to continue the relationship or nothing will come out, because the bed did not grow together. Another partner thinks that sex happens only when something has already grown together, that is, a couple together and for a long time.
If after sex it turns out that the partners differently evaluate the event, then the pleasure will be forgotten, and the troubles will remain.
What do we do?
Well, at least approximately decide what to do. At least – what exactly will not be engaged. If the partner believes that anal sex – this is just as common as the vaginal, and pornographic poses – the most comfortable and natural, then sex turns into a traumatic occupation.
Or you are ready for oral sex, if the partner answers the same, and he is not going to try. Too unpleasant.
Better, of course, to say what are you generally waiting for: slow sex with tenderness and for the whole night, experiments and passions or in general are going to relieve tension.
To whom do we talk about this?
The boundaries of personal space are different for everyone. Someone about their adventures leads the channels in Telegram, describing the special signs of all partners so that they can be identified in the morgue. Someone shoots a video (and it’s not known where it will turn out later). And someone is embarrassed silent and does not split even during a heart-to-heart conversation with friends and a bottle.
Sex is engaged in a minimum of two, and if a partner does not like to put on the look of a sexual life, then just consider his desire.
Agree, which mention is acceptable: “I do not talk about it”, “We have a relationship”, “Something was” or “Is this the kind of pose you know that he did?”. And do not break the agreement, even if you tell only the best friends and a terrible secret.